Who's Afraid Of The Big Bad Wedding Toast?

by David Pitlik
ThePerfectToast.com

Few things in life are more nerve wracking than having to come up with the perfect toast for your best friends - the bride and groom - on the day of their wedding. You know you want to say something memorable and poignant. You know you want to make everyone laugh, then cry. After all, that's what a really great wedding toast does.

But coming up with those special words is only half the battle, because once you've got them, you'll have to step into the spotlight, with that video camera rolling, and all those wedding guests hanging on your every word. Let's face it, the wedding toast is possibly the most important speech you'll give in your entire life. Talk about performance anxiety. It's enough to make you hit the open bar!

Fortunately, giving a terrible toast is not a fate relegated to all but the most experienced public speaker. Following some simple guidelines, virtually any nervous toast giver can successfully shine in that big moment.

It's important to remember that this is probably the most receptive audience you'll ever face. So fear not! Everyone's rooting for you, and will laugh at the merest joke, and sob at the simplest sentiment. Frankly, they want to be putty in your hands. Don't let them down.

Here are a few tips to help you give a great toast:

• Perhaps most important, yet most often forgotten -- practice, practice, practice. Before you ever set foot in front of those guests, be sure you have read your speech out loud numerous times to become completely comfortable with what you're going to say. You're less likely to freeze up if you're confident in those words.
• Be sure to speak slowly and clearly. With all that adrenaline pumping through your body you'll need to remind yourself to slow down. You also might want to avoid that triple espresso right before the toast. Likewise on the second, third and fourth drink you were considering to muster your courage.
• Talk louder than you think is necessary, since you're going to be competing with other noises like drunk relatives, busboy trays and the thunderous pounding of your own heart.
• Make eye contact with as many guests as possible. This will make everyone feel you're speaking directly to them.
• Don't forget to breathe. It's okay to take your time, plus breathing will keep you from passing out in the middle of your toast.
• Keep a smile on your face despite that flock of butterflies taking off inside your stomach. People will enjoy your toast more if it looks like you're really enjoying yourself.
• If you misspeak or stumble on some words, don't worry about it. Just plow ahead, no one's keeping score.
• Keep it short and sweet. You don't want to steal attention away from the bride and groom. After all, it is their day!

David Pitlik is the founder and senior writer for ThePerfectToast.com, a service that writes custom wedding toasts. As a television comedy writer, a speech writer for Fortune 1000 CEOs, and a frequent contributor to bridal publications, David knows his way around a toast. He's been helping members of the wedding party with speeches to the bride and groom that won't soon be forgotten.